Last night Jeff’s dog, Benson, almost died from anaphylaxis, which is an acute systemic (multi-system) and severe Type I Hypersensitivity allergic reaction in humans and other mammals. Benson required immediate emergency treatment because of the threat of rapid constriction of the airway, often within minutes of onset, which can lead to respiratory failure and respiratory arrest. Brain and organ damage rapidly occurs if the patient cannot breathe.
Dr. Hinchy McGee, the veterinarian whose fast action saved Benson’s life called us this morning with a startling finding.
I say us, because Benson is employed at Catch Your Limit as a watch dog, mascot and greeter (Wal-Mart eat your heart out). We all feel Benson is as much ours as he is Jeff’s. In fact, Benson is the highest paid employee at Catch Your Limit with an impressive six figure salary plus bonus.
Jeff has begged senior management to let him switch jobs with Benson, but management doesn’t think Benson would like cleaning toilets.
Anyway, back to the story. Dr. McGee discovered that the root cause of Benson’s life threatening ordeal was that he eats buggers … not just any buggers, but the buggers from Jeff’s own nose … therefore Jeff’s buggers.
Jeff, who seems to be in denial continues to say that he thinks it is not only cute, but that this is actually supposed to be beneficial, and is natures way of strengthening a dog’s immune system.
Dr. McGee, while maintaining his professional demeanor, could only say, “yuk”.
Melissa, one of the partners in the firm, suggested she knew all along that letting your dog eat buggers out of your nose was not only morally wrong (she quoted some bible verse), but just plain bad etiquette (she quoted Miss Manners).
Benson in the meantime is alive, but has changed. He is just not the same old watch dog, mascot, greeter that he was before last night’s incident.
He has eaten three books ( Good to Great, Orbiting the Giant Hairball and The Essentials of Drucker), a shoe, a laptop and at least 100 of the plastic flies CYL used in its last mailer. He has now grabbed our cleaning lady by the ankle and is holding her for ransom in the cleaning closet.
We have called 911 and will keep you posted, lord willing.
Jeff is ranting now … we think he has gone mad. He continues to scream, “a nose for a nose, Benson … a nose for a nose.”
><(("> Tom Laughon
Tom is affectionately known as BIG ><(("> at Catch Your Limit
Catch Your Limit
Management Guides & Fish Cleaning Services
><(("> Camps in Tallahassee, Florida and Richmond, Virginia
To learn more, visit www.catchyourlimit.com.